last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize