and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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