I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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