do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
