no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
