If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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