This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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