You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
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