Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
