Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
