She's JV to your varsity
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
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