I didn't shave. On purpose
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
