Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
