Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Randomize
