Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
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