I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
