who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
third nipple confirmed
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Randomize
