You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
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