My friends, they love my intelligence
I'm eating all of the evidence.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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