I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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