In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Randomize
