I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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