Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize