I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
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