the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
We are all done wearing pants today
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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