I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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