just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
