'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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