Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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