The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize