Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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