im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
