Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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