I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize
