it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Randomize