Dual....:-)
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Randomize
