Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
I wish you could order shots online.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
