And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Randomize