I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
