forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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