Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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