I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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