you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
