Sponge bath it is.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
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