Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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