so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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