Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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