Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize