i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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