"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize