The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
